my favorite little chubby cheeks

bloody knuckles

Letter to a Somebody who's now a Nobody.



I believe in your God..
I value the things you do.
My heart is good and pure like yours.
My intentions are true.
So in this short, dull gray life and collapsing world, when we are allotted small and beautiful things like each other, capture them.
When we dream a dream worth remembering we ought to write it down.
When we possess a talent worth sharing with the world, it's important that we do.
You are my dream.
You are my music.
Most importantly you are worth remembering. Sharing. Writing down and keeping.

This is love.

A heart in love is not sorrow, anger, deception, ache.
It is never easy, simple, or appropriately timed. This is why we must catch it. Run after it. Become breathless obtaining it, because it is breathtaking.

It is never easy and that is why we must work to keep it. To write it, play it, live it, enjoy it, share it.
With each other.

This is what the God I believe in teaches me.
My god is your God.
I am good like you.

My intentions, true.

old soul, new body.

Supposedly your sex organs are your body parts containing the most nerve endings. I find that hard to believe considering my heart is literally feeling such a dull ache I can barely breathe. Funny that the two feelings are so deeply connected.

How do you feel there is ever a chance at love for anyone when the example set before you are my parents? I realize I must sound like I'm having a pity party over here for myself. Things could be a lot worse. I can't help but feel extremely lost though.

Surprisingly enough, of all the sad love songs, sappy romantic movies I've watched, and season's of The O.C. that I've wasted hours watching, nothing, and I mean nothing, could have ever prepared me for the heartache that comes from mistakes, hormones, and most importantly love. I know, for the wise and more experienced readers how could I possibly know what I'm talking about. 18 and young and full of potential and life and promise! Fresh out of high school and so smart. Heartbroken, jaded, and cynical as a republican senator (still able to crack a joke for my left-wing Tenney family, though. You should hardly be surprised my sarcasm isn't lacking, I guess..).

I just hope these things work themselves out. It's a damned irony that time is what heals this kind of thing. Because patience is all I've had, and I'm fresh out.